Convincing family.

Many reverts to Islam are the only reverts in their family. Sometimes families tolerate and even support their loved ones going down the path of Islam while maintaining their own particular beliefs. Some families are not welcoming to the idea at all, oftentimes abandoning their child or sibling after the reversion or intent to revert is revealed.

“O you who believe, save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones over which are (appointed) angels, stern and severe, who flinch not (from executing) the commands they receive from God, but do (precisely what) they are commanded.” (Quran 66:6) 

I'm sure I speak for many reverts when I say we suffer distress at the thought of our families suffering in jahannam for the rest of eternity. “But those who reject Our signs, they are the companions of the left hand. On them will be Fire vaulted over (meaning the gates will be locked).” (Quran 90:19-20). Quite a stressful ayat when we think about how we are bringing Islam to them and many times they do not accept the message of Islam.

Zahra:

My parents and extended family are hardcore Southern Baptists, and to most Americans, you understand how intense that particular denomination is. I was raised in Southern Baptist Convention churches, although my middle childhood lacked church and religious direction due to my father's work taking us to Europe. We came back to the US and did not really become heavily involved with church until after my freshman year of high school, and believe me when I say heavily involved. My parents and I fell out of the church routine towards the end of my high school days, although I was still a member of quite a few Christian youth clubs.

When my parents found out that I had become a Muslim, they initially kicked me out of the house and cut me off. They literally left me with the clothes on my back. No car, no phone, not even a purse to carry my things in. I had to call a friend at 1 o'clock in the morning to pick me up. The next day, I closed my bank accounts, borrowed a car, and three of us drove for the three hours to my college to clean out my apartment of everything we could before my parents could get to it. I took out student loans to pay for a meal plan and got a dorm room assignment. That afternoon, my dad texted my friend telling him to contact me and tell me to check my e-mail. He wrote that both he and my mom were sorry for what they did and wanted me to come home. I went home the next day.

To this day, I still have arguments and scuffles with both of my parents that almost makes life unbearable with them. As bad as this sounds, I sometimes think that things probably would have been a lot better had they just left me to be on my own. My mother tends to go through peaks and troughs, but oftentimes I feel like she's in this awful depression, and that's both heartbreaking and extremely irritating for me to see. I would love for my parents to come to Islam and see the real peace it brings. One day, inshAllah.

Nikita:

I have yet to come out to my family about my faith, and when I say come out, I mean officially. My parents know I pray, and they've come to acknowledge that I refuse to eat pork products. My Hindu grandmother has no idea that I pray. I have yet to come out to them in fear, my parents have already said they feel I am giving up hundreds of years of family tradition. They feel hurt, and betrayed. My mom learned that I was waiting to turn 18, and move out to college to wear hijab. My parents quickly threatened to pull me out of college and make me live at home to attend community college. 

The point I'm getting at is that approaching your family about transitioning into a practicing Muslim is hard, and there are words and actions that can bring you down and hurt your iman. It is the Shaitan trying to mislead you, and make you feel like your own family is against, and disowning you. The trick is time, it is ease, it is pace. You cannot expect a couple weeks, or a couple months for things to turn around. You have to slowly bring your parents to the idea of Islam, and the idea of being a Muslim. Try to teach them about the faith as opposed to trying to teach them why you want to wear hijab, or grow out your beard, or choose to eat halal, it takes time, faith and dua. Insha'Allah the families of the reverts will accept not only their reverted family, but Islam itself.

Until next time,

N&Z

Source

Prayer.

Salaam aleykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu,

One of the most well-known traits of Muslims is prayer. The bowing and prostrating is quite distinctive to Islam, and oftentimes the fact that the required prayers are five times a day is mind-boggling to those who do not know much about Islam. One things that many Muslims strive to do is to get all five prayers on time every day in order to get maximum reward for their efforts, inshAllah. One of the first things that reverts really need to do is learn how to pray salah.

Zahra:

I learned how to pray well before I took Shahadah. After a solid semester of going to Juma'a, it was easy to know the motions of prayer. I only knew the English translations of prayer and knowing the translation made it quite easy. The translation was so beautiful, the praise of Allah and sendings blessings to Muhammad pbuh was not necessarily a new concept to me, but it was different than how I had prayed before.

I only learned two suras besides al-Fatiha, so memorizing salah in Arabic was not that hard, al7amdullilah. I was fortunate enough to find a series of YouTube videos that I used over and over again in order to memorize everything. However, I am not a creature of habit. It is really hard to get in the habit of getting myself up off the couch five times a day to pray. I still struggle with it, but I know there is great reward for me, inshAllah. Some days are harder than others, but once the prayer is finished, I feel so much better.

The transition to becoming a more adherent Muslim has been a challenge. Nursing school has made it so hard to connect with fellow Muslims in person. Granted, I have a large Twitter following that supports me in everything I do, and that helps make up for it. They have made it so easy for me to learn how to be a better Muslim and they drive me to want to be better. I also definitely do not want to disappoint Allah swt, and everything I do these days is for the sake of Allah.

Nikita:

I learned to pray before taking my shahada, and was in the habit of praying, albeit not 5 times a day, before saying those binding words as well. I had learned how to pray in Arabic and thus making the transition into praying a little easier. I learned the translation at the beginning as well so that I could complete my prayers whole heartedly.

Praying 5 times a day can be difficult, and like Zahra said, some days are easier than others. After I took my shahada was the most difficult, but one day something just happened and I knew I HAD to pray. Since that day, alhamdulillah, my namaz has been more consistent. I have been blessed to have friends that are born Muslims and have helped me learn the proper pronunciation and names for things in Arabic. (Most of these friends are south Asian, as am I, which explains my use of the words "namaz" and "azaan" instead of "salat" and "adthan")

Once you get in the pattern of making your 5 daily prayers, you get in the habit, and it is harder to break. Unfortunately this is also the case if you forgo prayer, it is harder to get back into the swing of things.

The best thing to do is to make dua, give to others, do things to raise your imam and surely prayer becomes easier each day. Insha'Allah.

Until next time,

N&Z

Charity and Islam

Salaam aleykum!

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "The believer's shade on the Day of Resurrection will be his charity." - Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 604.

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "Save yourself from hellfire by giving even half a date-fruit in charity." - Sahih Al-Bukhari, Volume 2, Hadith 498.

There are huge rewards in giving charity. There are tons of hadith on giving, even if it's just half a date! Even smiling is considered a form of charity in Islam! How awesome is that? You can get rewards just for smiling at somebody!

Zahra:

Something that is very near and dear to my heart is charity. I have done volunteer work since I was very young and continue to do volunteer work through my college and the nursing program. I also like to donate money when I can, especially to causes that really tug at my heartstrings.

I believe that charity does not always have to be monetary. I am a firm believer in giving time to causes as well. There are quite a few programs, such as Project Downtown. You could even volunteer to clean your local mosque or Islamic center and still be rewarded for it in the hereafter. Volunteering is free for everyone and is a wonderful use of spare time. Remember, the Prophet sws told us to take advantage of our youth while we are young. Volunteering by doing handiwork is one way to do this.

Nikita:

Charity and volunteering aren't always big, or grandiose acts. Holding the door open or even helping an elder carry their groceries is not only polite, but a form of charity. Currently I am currently an unemployed student, but that doesn't mean I'm not trying to give money to a better cause. Even if it's only a couple dollars here and there, give to organizations or local organizations that helps people in need, volunteer at a soup kitchen. There are rewards in feeding your ummah, but not only your ummah, feeding others. Never let your situation hold you back from helping others, even if it's in the smallest way possible.


It is quite amazing that charity is so easy to give these days. Technology has made it very simple to pay by credit or debit card and many masjids have their own PayPal fundraiser accounts linked right on their websites. Donating to various causes has never been easier!

If you want an easy way to give charity, we are providing several links for you to donate to some Islamic causes. The last three links contain searches of justgiving.com that will always have charities on there. Feel free to revisit this post every month and donate a little bit to our brothers and sisters in need, inshAllah.

This fundraiser is in England in memory of Tehseen Khan, a great man who recently passed away.

Help a new sister who needs help paying off student loans.

Help build a masjid in America.

Help deaf Muslims go on Umrah.

There are hundreds of charities on justgiving.com that are tagged as Islamic:

Link 1

Link 2

Link 3

May Allah reward all of us for our charity and help us find new ways to give back to our Ummah. Ameen.

Until next time,

N&Z

Note: All hadith in this post can be found here

World Hijab Day! -Zahra

Salaam aleykum!

As many of you know, I recently participated in World Hijab Day this past Friday. It was a phenomenal experience and I had such a great day, al7amdullilah.

The purpose of World Hijab Day is to give non-hijabi Muslim women and non-Muslim women a chance to experience what it's like to be a covering woman. It helps spread the message of Islam to those who may not have been exposed to it beforehand.

Since I don't wear hijab and won't be wearing it for a few more months, I decided to go ahead and do World Hijab day. I ran several errands, which included the bank, hair salon, and grocery store. I also had classes that day, so I was considerably nervous for my classmates' reactions. Facebook, Twitter, and Keek all voted to decide what I would wear. I wound up wearing a beautiful black dress from Hijab-Ista and a kelly green jersey hijab. I also made a tag telling people to ask me about World Hijab Day.

Everyone was really nice to me, and I had a lot of questions. There was a considerable amount of staring when I went to the grocery store, but I didn't mind. I felt awesome wearing hijab. It was really wonderful, knowing that for that one day I was representing Islam 100%. I can't even describe how it felt to be covered. It was great to feel so modest and to know that I was protecting my entire being, even just for a day.

I truly cannot wait to don hijab now. I had long forgotten the feeling of security and satisfaction I had from covering my hair. Just a few more months and I can have hijab permanently.

Thank you all for participating and your amazing support. This could not have happened without you being there by my side.

Until next time,

Zahra

Links:

http://www.worldhijabday.com

http://www.hijab-ista.com

Following Sunnah

Salaam Aleykum!

One thing that we are encouraged as Muslims to do is follow the sunnah, or actions, of the Prophet Muhammad (sws). Sunnah, when literally translated, means a well-trodden path. There are many different sunnah we can and should follow. We can find many sunnah practices in the hadith collections and also from other sunnah practices that have been handed down since the time of our beloved Prophet (sws).

Zahra: 

Following the sunnah of the Prophet (sws) is something that I learned quickly after taking my Shahadah. It seems like I learn a new sunnah every day! Of course, establishing these new habits has been really hard, some more than others, but I love that I can do things every day that emulates how the Prophet (sws) lived his beautiful life.

My favorite sunnah to follow is reciting Al-Ikhlas, Al-Falaq and Al-Nas before bed. I live in a not-so-awesome part of town, so I don't always feel safe in my apartment. When I recite these and then Ayat al-Kursi, I feel at peace and I can relax enough to sleep.

Innovations or invented sunnah are out there, and they definitely do freak me out. I always try to research a sunnah before I attempt to put it into practice. InshAllah my research is sufficient.

Nikita:

I get really excited for Fridays, it's that feel-good Jummah day. I have to say, my favorite sunnah is reading Surah al-Khaf. I am unable to properly learn Arabic in my current state, and by continuously reading the surah, I have become more familiar with the Quran. Reading al-Khaf usually consists of an additional reading of other surahs, and then slowly but surely trying to memorize them. Doing one sunnah act can lead to others, and has truly opened my heart to living my life in a way that is closest pleasing to the Almighty.

Comment on this post and tell us your favorite sunnah!

Until next time,

N&Z

The hijab.

Salaam aleykum!

For those of you who follow us on Twitter, you may have noticed the amount of "SISTER WEAR HIJAB!" posts we've been getting. We want to stress that we do have some very valid reasons for not wearing hijab. If you've never been to the United States, please keep your comments to yourself. You cannot and will never understand what it's like to be an American Muslim, especially for those of us who live in more remote areas of the country where Islamophobia is rampant.

Zahra: 

I have a confession: I'm an ex-hijabi. I converted and accidentally started wearing hijab full-time. I wasn't planning to cover until after I graduated, but once I had to wear it out a few times, I decided it wasn't so bad. I made the decision to keep it on when classes started back up and I just wouldn't tell my parents about it.

Bad, BAD idea.

I needed to find a part-time job so I could have something to do over the summer. I will never forget how I went in to talk to a potential employer about completing the application process and the receptionist took one look at me, went to the back to go talk to someone, came back out and said "We're not actually hiring." Somehow, someone managed to get onto my Facebook account and found pictures of me wearing hijab. They took those pictures, went to my mother's workplace, showed them to her, and started harassing her about having a Muslim kid. My mom called me and started freaking out. "You're a target for crime! You're going to get hurt!" Some other events occurred and I knew that my life would not be stable until I got out of college and out of my parents' care.

I miss wearing hijab so much, especially over Ramadan. I feel like I had so much more respect while wearing hijab. I feel like I'm missing something, and I am. I looked like a Muslim and people were not surprised when I asked if I could be excused for ten minutes so I could go pray. InshAllah I will graduate in May and by my 22nd birthday in June I will be covered up and finally feel whole again.

Nikita: 

I guess I can say what really excited me about Islam was the beauty of hijab. The beauty of covering for the sake of God. Unfortunately, the hijab is often misunderstood as a means of female oppression, creating difficulties, especially for converts. My struggle with hijab and being able to finally put it on is not only a matter of ability to, but the commitment to wearing it for the rest of my life. Sometimes I feel ready to finally put on a scarf, other days, all I have to wear are skinny jeans.

Hijab is more than a headscarf, and as a revert, you often see both men and women adorning their respective hijab (men with beards, you know what I mean) yet they forget they are representing the faith. Hijab is more than a headscarf, niqab is more than covering your face, it goes so much deeper than that. I hold off on wearing hijab because of my family, my community, and because I don't feel I am at a maturity and understanding where I can represent Islam well. I have so much more growing up and developing to do. Hijab is Fard, and for this reason, Insha'Allah I will wear it in the future.

On this note, I'd also like to talk about something I've noticed coming from outside the faith; people are quick to say "sister, put on a hijab" or "brother, grow a beard" but we don't know the struggles the person is going through. We can't and shouldn't judge others just because of their outward appearance.

Until next time,

N&Z

PS: Follow us on Twitter, shoot us an e-mail, or ask us a question on ask.fm! We love to hear from you!

"I asked for strength..."

"...and Allah gave me struggles to make me stronger."

Asalaamu aleykum!

Juma'a mubarak! Al7amdullilah, we have made it through another week. School has started back up for most of us, which means endless nights of studying and a potentially unhealthy amount of caffeine.

We wanted to start off our weekly blogs by sharing our greatest struggle with you. Like everyone, we have struggles. Sometimes, we feel like they are magnified because we are reverts. We know that Allah would not give us anything we can't handle. We want you to know that you're not alone in your hard times, and we want to give you someone to relate to.

Zahra:

I have had my fair share of rough times since I reverted to Islam. One of my biggest battles is the fact that I cannot attend Juma'a salat. Unfortunately, my school schedule does not allow me to attend the one thing that would teach me the most Islam and give me reward by praying in congregation. Also, the closest masjid is about a 90 minute highway drive away from my college. There have been semesters where I had the time off to go, but the drive made it impossible to make it back to class on time.

I miss going to regular Friday prayers, and I certainly do appreciate it when I am actually able to attend. As the old adage goes, "you don't know what you have until it's gone." InshAllah I will be able to work in a place that will allow me to have Friday afternoons off so I am able to go to a masjid for Friday prayer.

If you are able to attend the masjid, please do. The masjid is a valuable resource and there are great rewards in praying in congregation. Take advantage of what Allah has provided for you. You don't know who would readily take your place and appreciate the value!

Nikita:

In today's world, religion isn't a big deal. I've noticed many people casually claiming to be Christian, Hindu, Sikh, Jewish...but it seems to be more of a title than guidelines for their actions. That's why when you hear people convert, you're surprised. In this day and age, where everyone is busy and the dunya controls our thoughts and actions, really, who gives theology much thought?

I have lost friends as a result of my conversion, and having to "come out" about converting is by biggest struggle thus far. Many are surprised to hear I converted, but when they hear "I converted to Islam:" cue shocked expressions.

Alhamdulillah, with time and patience I was able to save most of those relationships, but there were definitely points where I felt completely alone and abandoned. Some friends never came around, it wasn't a huge fight that ensued "coming out" about my faith, but slowly...
"Hey, want to hang out this weekend?"
"Um no, sorry. I'm busy"
became a more frequent answer. Those things happened about a month or two ago, and at this point, unfortunately, those I considered practically family no longer acknowledge me or have any form of communication with me.

Being a born Muslim, you have the advantage of people initially accepting you for all of you. When you change part of yourself (in this case, converting to an often misunderstood faith), you can't always accurately gauge the reaction of peers, family and friends. I feel as though being a Muslim almost clears your slate, it pushes negative impacting influences away, and draws close those who remind you of Allah (swt). Ultimately I say Alhamdulillah, because though I have lost close friends, I have gained new valuable friends who remind me of my faith. Honestly, I'm much happier because of it.

Until next time,

-N&Z